Training for a goal for 2 years and not reaching it is hugely disappointing. In case you missed it, my hubby DNF’d (Did Not Finish) again in the Leadville 100. Race day was incredibly hot and he ran out of liquid in his water vest halfway between aid stations in a very open field with direct sunlight at 10,200 ft+ of elevation. He became so dehydrated and started cramping so bad that he could barely walk, even with the use of poles. And I have no positive spin or reframe. Sometimes things just feel really shitty and that’s okay. But you will get through the disappointment and all the big feelings. You just have to allow them to pass - like a log floating down a river. Eventually the feeling will fade from your awareness just like the log will eventually fade from your visual field. Allow the feelings to move through you but don’t cling to them.

You can’t do it alone. So why try? Humans are wired for social connection and we need each other to thrive. And not to be too morbid (but maybe a little, cause that’s me) I am certain there would have been a lot of dead runners without any crew supporting them! Now let’s take this extreme example & need for support and extrapolate to real life: You are not made or meant to do it alone. So maybe stop trying to ‘suck it' up’ and instead ask for some support. Who is part of your “crew” in your life?

The human body is capable of SO MUCH and YET, simple dehydration can kill you. Don’t underestimate the basics as a human being - hydration, nutrition and sleep are the 3 most foundational needs we have as human beings (besides connection, see #2). And no amount of training or desire for a belt buckle can overcome basic human physiological needs or crisis. And I am so glad that Ryan listened to his body and didn’t push to the point of ending up in rhabdo. No finish line is worth ending up in the hospital over. (And I should know, since I work in one. And yes, we do see patients with rhabdo after the Leadville 100 in the hospital.)

Even people with partial legs can be hard on themselves. Yes, you read that right. So as we were waiting for Ryan at the Twin Lakes checkpoint, we witnessed a double below-the-knee amputee run across the checkpoint line just minutes before the cut off time would have disqualified him. I found out his name from his badge # and then I found him on instagram. (Cause that’s what I do apparently - I find people I don’t know on the internet and message them videos I took of them. Like a total creep. But that’s neither here nor there.) Anyway, we messaged back and forth a few times and he said to me, “I have never run more than a marathon so while I was a touch disappointed that I missed the time cutoff at Winfield, I am so happy with what I did accomplish on this course.” As an Occupational Therapist and someone who has worked with many amputees, I can’t tell you just how incredibly inspired I was by Brian. You can read his full story here.

Who you surround yourself with matters more than you know. I joked to our crew that they would simultaneously be SO inspired and also feel like the laziest humans alive once they got around these runners at the aid stations. Talk about a humbling & awe-inducing experience! Being in an environment like the Leadville 100 made me realize that I really like being surrounded by people who challenge & push themselves - because this pushes me to grow as a human. And I believe that is what we are here to do as humans - to grow, expand & evolve.

Run YOUR race. Ryan explained to me multiple times that he was so much faster when he was in his body and focused on his BREATHING, and NOT his pace. When you allow yourself to get distracted by other runners, other people’s pace, running style, body type, gear, etc…it will NOT benefit you. Stay in your body and focus on running YOUR race. Same is true in life. If you lose your focus and start comparing yourself to everyone else, you stop living YOUR life. Run YOUR race. Live YOUR life. Don’t worry about anybody else.

It is so brave to just fucking go for it! Prior to Ryan’s first attempt at the Leadville 100 in the Summer 2022, he had never run a marathon, a half marathon, a 10k or even a 5k! I know, right?!? But 10 years ago, when we moved to Colorado, he heard about the Leadville100 and he just couldn’t get it off his mind or heart since then. And I believe that if something is on your heart for years without end, it was put there for a reason. Your job is not to know the reason or dictate the outcome, just to follow that inner niggling and GO FOR IT. Because the deepest regrets humans tend to have are not taking chances and failing but rather looking back on an un-lived life and all the chances not taken due to fear. Don’t let this be you. You have ONE life to live - just go for it!

Your greatness is determined by your level of commitment to showing up to do the unsexy training & preparation, not the outcome of the race. Winners aren’t only made on race day, they are made on the days when you don’t want to train, when you want to quit, when you want to let the excuses win, when you want to let comfort lead you instead of your goals. Winners are made on rainy days and during snow storms, not when conditions are JUST SO. If you want to grow as a person, learn to befriend discomfort - it is critical to the human experience.

Not everyone will understand your goals, pursue them anyway! I will NEVER understand why anyone would want to run 100 miles but to each their own. (My knees ache just thinking about that!) But I 100% supported Ryan with this goal - down to feeding him after training runs when he didn’t feel like eating and was being a total pain in the ass. Again, not a goal I understand but I admire his unwavering commitment to HIS goal, in addition to his lack of caring when people would tell him he is crazy in regards to this goal.

Life is not always about crossing finish lines. Sometimes it’s about getting to the starting line. It’s about the discipline and dedication to training and showing up everyday just to get to that starting line! And most importantly is is about who you become in the process of that - the kind of person who honors their commitments to themselves.